Gay Men & Explicit Content on Instagram’s Close Friends List

Consent is needed if you share sexually explicit content to folks on your list.

Gay Men & Blog
3 min readDec 11, 2021

Instagram’s Close Friends feature allows users to share pictures and videos to a select group of people. A bright green ring in the Stories scroll lets users know they’ve been chosen to see private and possibly juicy content from that person. However, just like in regular stories, you never know what you’ll see when you open it.

Some people use the Close Friends feature to share sexually explicit images and videos. Those who are added to someone’s Close Friends list are usually not given the option to agree to this. However, when it comes to nudity and sexual content, whether it’s in person, video chat, texting, DMs, or the Close Friends list, consent is needed.

Consent is an issue with the Close Friends feature because users don’t control if they get added to someone else’s list. In fact, anyone on Instagram can be added to a Close Friends list, whether they follow that person or not. However, only followers can see Close Friends content from private accounts.

Users cannot remove themselves from a Close Friends list unless they contact the person directly and ask to be removed. The less awkward option is to mute the user’s stories, but that eliminates their public and private stories.

Due to how Instagram has this feature set up, it is up to the user to obtain consent from anyone who they plan to share sexually explicit content with via Close Friends. Without consent, it becomes unsolicited, a nuisance, and possibly harassment, and that’s not hot. It takes extra work on the user’s part to get consent, but for those who say ‘yes’ to the invitation, it’ll feel welcomed and wonderful. Not to mention, it’ll help them avoid opening it at work or the family dinner table!

Keep in mind that other rules of consent apply to sexual content through Close Friends. If someone agreed to it at one point, it doesn’t mean it’s a yes forever, so circle back with them every once in a while, or have a structured way that folks can “unsubscribe”. Lastly, sexual history is not automatic consent to send someone unsolicited sexual content without their consent.

Happy and consensual sharing :)

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Gay Men & Blog

Writer of Gay Men & Blog — a blog dedicated to empowering gay men to heal, grow, and live a life of love and fulfillment.